Three Drunken Maidens and One Brilliant Escape

Sometimes the biggest escapes start with the smallest idea. In this scene from Broadside the Musical, Mercy Otis Warren and the Needle Guard are just upstairs, spinning wool and minding their own rebellious business, when a British patrol suddenly storms the Green Dragon. There’s no grand plan, no coded signal, just a room full of women, a pile of broadsides, and Mercy’s quick-thinking brain. She signals the tavern beggar, who hops onto a bench and grandly announces the night’s entertainment as “The Three Drunken Maidens!” Mercy grabs a sheet, steps forward like she’s been rehearsing all week, and launches straight into the song.

The "Needle Guard" sing a stanza of "Three Drunken Maidens"

The magic is how fast the mood flips. One second the grenadiers are stiff and suspicious, the next they’re chuckling into their collars as the “drunken maidens” wobble, wink, and belt out verses that grow more outrageous with every chorus. Hutchinson (played by Paul Revere) gets swept into the fun, the regulars roar with laughter, and even the guards can’t help humming along and tapping their boots. Mercy turns the whole scare into an improvised skit, passing out broadsides like song sheets, tossing in asides, and inviting the crowd to sing the refrain. It feels like nothing more than a raucous, rowdy tavern show that just happened to break out in the middle of patrol.

The "Needle Guard" perform for patrons of the Green Dragon Tavern

And that’s exactly why it works. While everyone is caught up in the chorus, guards, governor, and all, the Needle Guard quietly does what they came to do. They trade glances, switch places, usher friends toward the door, and slip through the patrol line under cover of laughter and ale. No one sees an escape; they see a party. By the time the last verse of “Three Drunken Maidens” tumbles out, the room is still buzzing, the guards are still grinning, and half the people Mercy needed to protect are already gone. An insignificant little drinking song has just pulled off the perfect getaway.